LEAD Delegate Diary

The following diary extracts are from 2009-2010 LEAD delegate Paul Winrow, MD of Southport Gate Co.

January 2009 - The Beginning
How can I get out of this, work!!! I’m sick of work!! Employees!!!!! They are driving me up the wall. It's my business and they WILL do as they are told.
What is it I have to do to get things done the way I want?

There is something I know, but what? I've read the books (honest). But where do I start, who do I talk to? My office manager...I think she understands the way I feel, but I will need to talk to her soon before she puts a shot-gun to my head and puts me out of my misery.

All I know is this: the getting frustrated and angry has to stop - I need to find a way to get the most out of my employees but how?


May 2009 - The Last resort
What can I do? I've tried the lot - courses on this, courses on that... I even tried University and discovered why I left school at 15 with no qualifications. I know there's something out there that can help me focus the business, but what?
And then someone said: "I’ve found this Paul, it's more practical, none of that writing or exam s***!"

I'm listening. Tell me more.

July 13th 2009 - Introduction to something new
I went to an introductory course and found a new approach by talking and learning from other small business managers/owners. Are they in the same boat? Yes, I think it's that and more: finance, business development, sales and all sorts of things. It's about being in a group, talking about your problems and learning from each other. There are some things I have experience in, but can they help me? Can I help someone else? Yes, it may work. Where do I sign up?

September 22nd 2009 - The overnighter
The what?
A process of getting to know and trust the people on the course with role play, games and lectures to try and start the thought processes I will need to achieve the new goals I am going to start setting myself.

Business bingo, swans and juggling ball are all games we do to learn something about ourselves and our other cohorts. One of the tasks we do is to draw a shield shape and split it into 4 and then draw pictures of how we see our present life. Very challenging, but the end result has helped me focus on some of the good things in my life I had forgotten about, and shown me the things I need to focus on to change the situation.

The tents are a great experience - just shows you that you shouldn't judge a book by its cover. Paul (my partner) and I are sent into a field to put up our own tents and then sit by ourselves and try and write our life story, with all the people who have influenced us. After 20 minutes we sit together and tell our partners our story. An exercise I thought would be difficult but in the end we needed more time. Comforting that I'm not the only one with troubles and a relief that I may have found someone to share them with.

The end of the first day.
Ah, the bar - I need a drink. I meet Julian, another delegate, and we chat. Was the day what we thought it would be? What do we hope to achieve? He’s thinking of funding expansion with overdraft. I‘ve done that and it cost me. "Have you thought about a loan, venture capital". If not, why? Plan expansion over a period of time and pay for it over that period. Meal, drink, drink too much, stress relief. I think there are people in the same boat as me.

September 23rd 2009 - The morning after...
Hung over, but eager to learn more. How can they help me? I don’t know, but I want to stick around and find out.

Chess! I will never forget it - a game with bosses, managers, workers and a big chess board. I think I'm starting to understand what my staff are thinking!

We start talking more about the future, how the group will develop and what the rest of the course will entail. Action learning sets, master-classes from experts in their fields, business shadowing and exchange and the forum were various topics that we discussed.

The end of the day comes too quickly but I look forward to seeing everyone soon at the first master-class, and on the way home I’m on the phone talking to my office manager for 2 hours about my new found enthusiasm for the business.

LEAD the way.

October 09
The master-classes start and the first expert mentor is Colonel Bob Stewart - UN commander in Bosnia, the class was entitled "Leadership and Negotiation". He describes various situations were he had had to negotiate with warring parties in order to complete an objective or task. The stories are harrowing and I can't help but wonder, "how does this relate to me?". I can't see how any of this is useful in business: you can't drive the proverbial tank through your workforce when you don't get what you want - which the colonel had literally done, destroying a local café in Bosnia when he was trying to get a stolen vehicle back from the local mafia.

In the reflection session we discussed how we felt the speaker's topic related to the way we lead our business. Most people were saying much what I was thinking.

We reflected while filling in our "learning log" (which we would later use as a reflection tool) and answering questions about the class.

Question 1: What features of Bob's leadership style did I notice?

I write without much hesitation:

1. Strong
2. Uncompromising but fair
3. Prepared to make mistakes and learn from them
4. Knowing what the desired end result is
5. Making a plan, then changing it if required and keeping everyone informed at all times

The realisation is starting to set in that there's much I need to learn and even more I need to change.


To Be Continued...